*Ahem* OPINIONS OPINIONS OPINIONS.  OPINIONS, OPINIONS OPI-INI-INI-INI-INIONS......OPINIONS!!  *disclaimer*  No matter what jokes I make I don't hate people who like these movies.

This is probably the least subjective one on this list since I actually enjoyed this movie.  The reason it's here is that it failed in what it set out to do, which was to scare me.  Really this movie made me laugh.  Like I said in my review it might be just because I love horror movies, but because I was expecting to be terrified by this movie it was disappointing to me.  And with that all of the objectivity in this list goes out the window.

I would recommend this movie to anybody who likes a funny horror movie(I'm probably just messed up and it's not that funny.)

I wasn't expecting much out of this movie......and I didn't get much.  All of the emotion was sucked out of the movie because the dad was voiced by NICOLAS CAGE the professional so bad he's good actor.  The action was fun and the colors were vibrant but it didn't have any substance.  it was fun to watch during the action, but any of the downtime was unbelievably clichéd. 

I would recommend this movie to anybody who likes an animated movie but they don't require much substance.  Think Year One if it were animated and didn't have the upside of it starring Jack Black.

This movie has The Croods-itis, in that it's pretty to look at and some of the action was really enjoyable but the story was just a generic racing movie......oh and SNAILS!  So pretty much just look at the previous entry and replace Nicolas Cage with Samuel L. Jackson.

I would recommend this movie to people who like The Croods. 

Mama was like The Conjuring, because it wasn't very scary, but I wasn't really entertained by it either.  The main characters were unlikeable, and I think that the CGI was way overdone in this movie.  Guillermo Del Toro is a master of making CGI blend with the real environments.....not in this movie.  "Mama" looked unbelievably silly when they finally revealed her at the end of the movie.  Speaking of the end of the movie, I think that the ending was way to cheesy for the atmosphere that they had set up throughout the movie.  The little girls were sufficiently creepy near the start of the movie, but when the focus switches from them to "Mama" the tensions completely goes away, and it turns into a generic ghost movie.

I would recommend this movie to anyone who doesn't watch many horror movies.

PUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I HOPE YOU LIKE PUNS!!!!!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THERE'S A LEEK IN THE BOAT!!!!!  HA!!!!!..........*phew* okay......I've calmed down now.  I had some high hopes for this movie because the first one was a pretty good family movie.  This on the other hand was the equivalent of jangling keys in the face of the audience for 2 hours(which also coincidentally is pretty much what these reviews are).  My real problem with this movie is that it was absolutely gorgeous but every joke was really predictable and the plot was beyond generic.  It was kept slightly entertaining in it's vibrant colors and animation, but a movie can't get away on looks alone (if they could Michael Bay would be a master of film making).




I would recommend this movie to anyone who likes...........

PUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As I said I didn't finish this movie.  I at least made throughout the rest of the movies on this list, I even made it through #1.  This still isn't higher on the list purely because.......I can't care.




I would recommend this movie to people who like to watch paint dry, while grass grows to the side, and a One Republic cover being sung by Foreigner plays in the background.

........I think I'm ready to talk about this movie without bursting a blood vessel......I think.  Enders Game was the most disappointing movie I've ever watched.  I was expecting a lot from this movie due to the book being one of the best science fiction stories I've ever read.  The movie on the other hand was one of the most generic movies I've ever seen.  If you haven't noticed yet I've been complaining that most of these movies are generic.......because I have......yeah.  My biggest problem with Enders Game is that it took away all of the character development and just decided to make Ender generic sci-fi hero #25739.  The book was a character study with some really interesting characters.  The book was at least decently subtle, but this movie was about as subtle as a train wreck.......on a plane.....that turns into a transformer and tears it's way through a giant billboard that says "FEEL SOMETHING!!!!!".....in 3D.  As I said in my review the script for this movie was most likely made by tearing apart the book then super gluing random parts together.  Incidentally I think I'm being a bit hard on this movie.








I would recommend this movie to anybody who thinks that Looper is too confusing.

They may as well have called this movie Found Footage Movie because that's pretty much what it is.  The whole idea of this type of movie is pointing out movies and saying "hahaha that existed right guys?!" without actually making a joke out of it they just point out that it existed.  They don't even wait to see if the movie that they're "parodying" will be remembered.  By doing that they date the movie instead of something like Space Balls or Airplane which can still be enjoyed to this day.  I've been told that the Wayans brothers are funny but I'm finding that very hard to believe after watching this train wreck. 




I would recommend his movie to anyone who likes "movie movies".

The tagline of this movie is "An equal opportunity offender"...........HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  Wow would you look at that, this movie actually made me laugh......wow.  This movie is like a Neo-Nazi in that it offends everyone except white, straight, Christian men.  Another thing that I learned about this movie is that most of the stuff in it happened to real people.  If I want to see people getting pranked I'll just go on YouTube.  The quality of Inappropriate Comedy is summed up in the sentence "it stars Rob Schneider." take that how you will.




I would recommend this to anyone who likes Rob Schneider.

 Movie 43 is just STUPID.  It is the most moronic, disgusting, mindless movie I've ever seen.  It's what the guys on Welcome to the Basement (check them out they're awesome) would call a talent bomb.  It's a bunch of incredibly talented people working on an unbelievably awful movie.  Imagine a movie starring Hugh Jackman, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Chloe Grace Moretz, Emma Stone, Uma Thurman, Halle Berry, and Johnny Knoxville.  Sounds really good right?  Now imagine that it's a sketch comedy that has 11 directors.  Does it still sound good?  Yes..........NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Every single joke was unbelievably stupid.  The idea of the movie is that this movie is really, really bad.  Instead of scrapping that idea and saying "No that's stupid, We should do a good movie instead." they decided to make it and just market it in a way that shows NOTHING about the movie.  The rest of the movies on this list at least had one or two good moments in them, but this had absolutely nothing to give.  I feel stupider for having seen this movie and I wouldn't recommend this movie to my worst enemy.




I would recommend this movie to anyone who was JUGGLED AS A BABY.  (I repeat this is all in the name of comedy, I don't hate people who like this movie.) JUGGLED AS A BABY!

I am so sorry that this was this late but......I'm lazy okay. I am hopefully going to fix this by giving myself a schedule. It will be a sort of loose form thing but it will hopefully help me to continue to write on here. My schedule will be at least one video on the weekend and maybe the occasional video on a week day. No specific dates because I know that I wouldn't be able to do that, so I'm just taking baby steps into the idea of regular content. I would love to put out more stuff but I still have to deal with school and home life so this is the best I can do for now. And now to make up for my perpetual lateness here are some stupid pictures I found on the Internet.

    This has been my first year of really getting into film and it's payed off in the large amount of incredible movies I saw this year.   Because of that making this list was really difficult.  I had 20 movies that I really enjoyed this year,so to make this list I had  to get rid of half the movies that I loved.
    Since it's really unlikely that you have the same opinion as me.  This list is my OPINION this OPINION will most likely be different from your OPINION but that is why I am saying that it's an OPINION...........*ahem* OPINION OPINION OPI-INI-INION OPINION OPINION OPINION OPI-NION.

It hurts me to put this movie so low on the list, but that speaks volumes for how good this year was for movies.  A lot of people said that this movie was boring, and to those people I say......nothing because they probably wouldn't be able to pay attention long enough to make it to the end of the sentence.  All of the performances in this movie were incredible and I cared about every character in the movie.

I would recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys a great drama that might be a bit slower than your common movie.  Happy Madison crowd beware.

And now on the complete opposite end of the spectrum...Elysium!  This was the new movie from Neill Blomkamp the director of District 9.  I wasn't expecting much from the trailers and I was pleasently surprised to say the least!  Elysium was action-packed and had an interesting story delivered by great actors. 

 I would recommend this to anyone who enjoys an action movies or sci-fi films with great stories. Whoa (5 awesome points if you get the reference)

AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME, AWESOME AWESOME......AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME, AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME.  AWESOME..........Ok I'll calm down and actually talk about the movie.  Objectively Pacific Rim didn't have a great story but frankly I couldn't care less, it was the most fun I've ever had at the movies!  Really the only reason it's this low is that it's not nearly as good on Blu-Ray as it was in the theaters. 

I would recommend this movie to anyone who likes fun! So not critic 1.

British comedy is by far my favorite type of comedy because it's so dry and sarcastic and that's exactly what this movie is.  Simon Pegg and Nick Frost were both hilarious in this movie as were the other people who I can't remember the names of.  I need to watch more of the Cornetto trilogy to see if they make this movie even funnier than it already is.

I would recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys British comedy.  Movies with one British guy don't count....I'm looking at you Happy Madison crowd.

American Hustle was such a great movie and it had some of the best dialogue I've heard in a movie this year.  All of the actors in this movie were having so much fun, especially Jennifer Lawrence.  She was just as great as she is in all of her movies and really, in real life.  The story was also  really fun and according to the beginning of the movie some of it happened. 

I would recommend it to anyone who likes movies about conmen. with some true parts apparently.

This movie was incredibly intense.  I was on the edge of my seat throughout the entire movie.  Sandra Bullock and George Clooney both gave incredible performances and that mixed with the unbelievable CGI it really gave a feeling of being in space. I'm really preaching to the choir with this one because most people went to go see this movie but if you didn't.....STOP READING THIS AND GO WATCH IT RIGHT NOW!  THIS LIST ISN'T EVEN THAT GREAT JUST GO!  GO!(PLEASE DON'T GO) GO! 

I would recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys movies that keep you on the edge of your seat.......IIIIIIIINNNNNNN SPAAAAAACCCCCE!

This was the movie that got me interested in F1 racing....for a couple hours but still I absolutely loved everything about this movie.  It was an adult drama despite what the trailers would have you believe, but it did have the intense racing that they showed in all the trailers.  The drama was intense,  all the racing scenes were beautiful, and all of the characters were really likeable.  The characters being likeable led to the aspect of this movie that I really liked, the fact that neither of the racers were the villain you found yourself rooting for each of them throughout the movie. 

I would recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys racing movies or dramas with really likeable characters (maybe too likeable(dundun dun duuuuuun))

This was the true story of Solomon Northup a  free African-American man who was captured and sold into slavery.  This movie stuck with me for weeks and I still think about it from time to time.  It was VERY hard to watch, but I would still recommend it to anyone.  Chiwetel Ejiofor gave an amazing performance under the incredible direction of Steve McQueen, who set up some of the most beautiful shots I've ever seen. 

I would recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys a historical drama.
  No joke for this one because this movie is too serious (massa) dang, couldn't escape making a roots reference.

Dallas Buyers Club was the most heartfelt movie that I've seen this year.  Matthew McConaughey gave an amazing performance as Ron Woodroof.  Jared Leto was even better as Rayon and he didn't play her stereotypically at all.  The movie also had a great message about accepting all people for who they are.  The story was compelling and I found myself rooting for a homophobic womanizing Texan which is a real challenge.

I would recommend this movie to anybody who isn't a STUPID FREAKING HOMOPHOBE!!!!........RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!!

*Trumpets!*THE WOLF OF WALLSTREET!!!!*More trumpets!*....!!!!!!  This was without a doubt the best movie of the year.  Dallas Buyers Club and 12 Years a Slave were both incredible but they don't come even close to this masterpiece.  It was the funniest movie I saw this year and one of the most dramatic movies of the year at the same time.  Throughout the course of the movie you saw the character of Jordan Belfort go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows throughout the course of this admittedly stupidly long movie.  No matter how long it was, it was always entertaining!  I loved this movie and I will be so angry if Leonardo DiCaprio doesn't get an Oscar for his amazing performance in this movie.

I would recommend this movie to anybody.......yeah just anybody.

Sorry that this review was so late but these lists are actually hard to make.....and I procrastinated a lot.  My top ten worst list will hopefully be finished by next week (maybe).

    This was my most anticipated movie of the year and...I was really disappointed..........yeah no this was by far the best movie of the year.

    Martin Scorsese is an incredible director and it speaks volumes that two of my five favorite movies are directed by Scorsese. The Wolf of Wallstreet is the "true" tale of Jordan Belfort(Leonardo DiCaprio). He was a stockbroker in the 1990s who became unbelievably rich by selling penny stocks for worthless companies for thousands of dollars.

    This movie was absolutely hysterical! There was a certain scene in particular which I don't want to spoil here so I'll just say that he takes a drug and it has some unexpected results. The story was also really fun and it had it's highs and lows.....but mostly highs.....both happiness and drugs. While I'm talking about it this movie is VERY gratuitous in it's sex and drugs. There actually was very little violence if there was any there was just lots of nudity. So yeah play it by ear if you think that you would be okay with that.

    The performances are what really made this movie good. Don't get me wrong it's written and directed really well too, but that wouldn't mean anything without great actors backing it up. DiCaprio was great in this movie and his reactions were hilarious. Jonah Hill was also great. I need to watch some more movies of his because I wasn't really aware of this, but he's a legitimately good actor. Belfort's wife Naomi Lapaglia(Margot Robbie) was really good and I hope to see more of her soon. Pretty much all of the actors in this movie were really, really good which isn't really surprising since Scorsese can get a good performance out of anyone.

    I don't really have any problems with this movie so I guess......the review is over....yep...bye...person.

10/10 the NEW best movie of the year

   

Wow this movie was really, really bad. Like unbearably awful. It took source material that was good and enjoyable and made them awful and unbelievably unfunny. I can't say much about this movie. It was just Scary Movie 4.5. My review of Innappropriate Comedy will mostly apply to this. I will say that this was better than that godawful abomination of a "movie" but it was close. There were a couple cute reactions and one or two good jokes but other than that it was complete garbage. It makes me so sad to see how far Marlon Wayans has fallen. I won't even talk about the story because it basically just copy pastes scenes from Paranormal Activity, The Devil Inside, and worst of all The Exorcist and adds a "comedic" edge to it. Avoid this movie unless you are looking for an awful parody movie or you are a fan of the Scary Movie franchise. If you aren't one of those two things avoid this movie at all costs and watch Airplane or Spaceballs.

2/10 a pretty awful movie with 2/3 funny moments.

This review was a block of text because if the makers of A Haunted House didn't feel like putting anything into their movie I shouldn't put any effort into my review.

Wow! I was really surprised by this movie. All of my friends had been raving about this movie but at the same time these are the friends that like Happy Madison movies so.....yeah.

I really, really liked this movie. It is a really, really strange movie and I mean that in the best possible way. The story follows Ron Burgundy(Will Ferrell) a news anchor who is loved by all of San Diego. This movie apparently takes place sometime in the 70s/80s when all reporters and anchors were men. Then one day his world is turned upside down when a female reporter named Veronica Corningstone(Christina Applegate) joins the network.

I really only have one problem and it's that the first third is not as good as rest of the movie. Not that it's bad, just the contrary. It's still better than most comedies but I just don't think that it stands up to the rest of this hilarious, inventive movie.

I'm probably preaching to the choir with this review because pretty much everybody has seen this movie. If you haven't seen it yet I would highly reccomend it. I don't want to say much more about it because I don't want to ruin the pure spectacle of one of the great American classics.

9.5/10 the funniest comedy I've seen since Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

And since everybody has their favorites from this movie I'll mention mine. Minor spoilers ahead

Favorite character:Brick because he's freaking Brick everyone loves him.

Favorite moment:the battle because it is one of the strangest most random things I've ever seen.

And of course the one that everyone talks about! Favorite quote: *drumroll* Ron Burgundy: Wow. Never ceases to amaze me. What cologne you gonna go with? London Gentleman, or wait. No, no, no. Hold on. Blackbeard's Delight.

Brian Fantana: No, she gets a special cologne... It's called Sex Panther by Odeon. It's illegal in nine countries... Yep, it's made with bits of real panther, so you know it's good.

Ron Burgundy: It's quite pungent.

Brian Fantana: Oh yeah.

Ron Burgundy: It's a formidable scent... It stings the nostrils. In a good way.

Brian Fantana: Yep.

Ron Burgundy: Brian, I'm gonna be honest with you, that smells like pure gasoline.

Brian Fantana: They've done studies, you know. 60% of the time, it works every time.(source: IMDB)http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0357413/trivia?tab=qt&ref_=tt_trv_qu

I didn't finish this movie.....I finished movie 43 the WORST movie I have ever seen EVER. It's not that it's bad, oh don't get me wrong it's bad. The reason that I didn't finish the movie is because it was really, really boring. I would still reccomend that everyone should watch this movie just because of how silly it is. Make sure not to watch the trailer either it will ruin the magic. You don't have to finish it either there is just something in this movie that is too funny for anyone to not see.

?/10 I didn't finish it (if I ever do I might make a proper review)

    What!? He actually watches movies that aren't dark and depressing! That was actually the reaction a lot of my friends had when I told them I went to go see this movie.

    I had an excuse to go see this movie because my brother went to go see it. It was actually a good movie. Really it was just a Disney movie, that is not at all a bad thing. It was really pretty, and happy, and it was decently funny too. The comic relief characters in these movies can either make or break it, and thankfully Olaf in this movie was really good. I really only had two big problems with this movie. One of them was that I didn't think that it dark enough, and for those of you saying " it's just a kids movie" I have three words for you. The. Lion. King.

    My other problem deserves an entire paragraph because it really annoyed me. My massive problem with this movie was the singing. It was irritatingly shoved into the movie without any thought of whether it makes any sense what so ever. Many movies are like this, but it was really jarring in this because the movie is really good otherwise. there is one part that really stands out to me where one of the characters says "I'm going to say something really crazy" and then begins to sing.

    Overall this was a good movie. You already know if this is your kind of movie, but if you're like me, then maybe you might just enjoy this movie (Critic 1 is too much of a snob to go see this movie so go yell at him).                                                   7/10 Good but with a few irritatingly glaring flaws

    Alright I've downed a bottle of Xanax I think I'm ready to talk about this movie (don't do that kids).

    Out of the Furnace is the new Christian Bale movie from Scott Cooper the director of Crazy Heart.   It's about Russel Baze a working class man who works in a steel mill, who's brother Rodney(Casey Affleck) a Vietnam war veteran, gets wrapped up in a fight club. The fight club is run by Woody Harrelson who gives an amazing performance in this movie, every scene he is in is uncomfortable in a really good way. Speaking of performances pretty much all of them were really, really good. This is the first Casey Affleck movie that I've watched and this has gotten me really interested in seeing more of him. His character is a broken Vietnam veteran who owes money to John Petty (Willem Dafoe). He is fighting to make money so that he can pay him off, but he decides to join Woody Harrelson's fight club so that he can make more money, and it all goes downhill from there.

    Also do not believe the trailer for this movie, it makes it look like an action movie, but it is a slow-burn drama though and through. I got a "The Deer Hunter" vibe from this movie which is a really good thing because I love that movie.   As I said the beginning this movie is really depressing. Everything is going wrong for Christian Bale's character. I swear there was a hunting scene and I thought that the guy he was hunting with would get mauled by a bear.

    I thought the story was vey good although a lot of other reviewers would disagree. It was pretty straight forward, but it was told in a very strange way. They would during certain scenes, skip between the two brothers showing how their lives were different and I really liked that. The cinematography was also beautifully done. The mixture of the amazing music and the gorgeous shots made for a really good atmosphere.

    Even though I have been raving about this movie, and how amazing it is, it did have some flaws. While I said that I really enjoyed the story the first act was really slow and padded out. I didn't have a huge problem with that but there were definitely parts that seemed a bit pointless. This is kind of a minor story spoiler but it happens in the first 30 minutes so 3.....…...................................... 2................................................................. 1.................................................................              (spoiler parentheses on)(Christian Bales character gets in an accident and gets charged with drunk driving so he gets put in jail. The entire jail sequence was pretty pointless because his character didn't change from that experience at all. It really only gives his wife a reason to leave him for Forest Whitaker's character.).               OKAY SPOILERS OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                    Another thing is that even though he gave an amazing performance as a broken man he seriously needs to learn to anunciate. I couldn't understand what he was saying sometimes and it really annoyed me because the dialogue was amazing. Another person who spoke strangely was Forest Whitaker. He was trying to do a southern accent but.......he wasn't very good at it. There was also a very good sad scene that was completely marred because for some reason he sounded like Batman which was.........odd.

I can definitely see why some people didn't like this movie but if you have the patience, this movie is incredible and rewarding. It's really not for everyone but if you like slow-burn dramas definitely see this movie.

9/10 a slow but rewarding movie that will depress you in a really, really good way.

    I was watching a video about Roger Ebert, who is considered to be one of the greatest film critics to ever live. It got me thinking about how little I am actually putting into this considering that it is a hobby more than anything else. Just seeing how much he put into his reviews, doing five movies a week, writing a review, and talking about it on TV with Jean Siskell. So anybody who is actually reading this tell me anything that I can do to make my reviews better, it would mean a lot just to know that people actually care enough to help me get better at reviewing the things that I am passionate about. And here is an amazing picture to counteract all of that seriousness.

In fact here's another one

Why yes that is an elevator full of snowmen with the face of George Takei....what? You don't have that picture on your iPad....no...ok.

Wow and to think just 3 days ago I said 12 Years a Slave couldn't be topped.

Dallas Buyers Club is the incredible true story of Ron Woodroof(Matthew McConaughey). A homophobic, womanizing, alcoholic, drug addict from Texas(he seems like a real nice guy, huh?), who gets AIDS. This isn't as much a story about him living with AIDS, it's more about him learning to accept all people, and help people to help people, not make money, and him fighting the FDA. Jared Leto plays Rayon or Raymond a cross dresser and drug addict, who Ron meets while in the hospital and slowly becomes friends with after immediately not liking him because he's gay and a cross dresser. this movie mostly focuses on his struggle to get drugs that actually combat AIDS into hospitals instead of drugs the FDA was payed to put in hospitals.

All of the performances in this movie are incredible. This is by far my favorite Jared Leto performance and he was in Fight Club(the best movie ever,ever). This is partially a feel-good movie and partially a depressing look into how people actually treat homosexuals even today. This is probably the closest I have ever been to crying during a movie. The performances are so incredible that I didn't see Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto, I saw Ron Woodroof and Rayon. When they were crying I believed that they were crying, and when they were friends I believed that they were actually friends(not to say Matthew McConaughey and Jared Leto hate each other). If anything you should go see this movie because Matthew McConaughey(getting really tired of typing that) and Jared Leto starved themselves to be skinny for this movie.

The cinematography in this movie is beautiful. The director didn't use any artificial light which gives the movie a dirty, grimy look that fits the atmosphere(there's that word again) perfectly. Beware to any kids reading this review, this movie is very awkward to see with parents, because there is a lot of nudity, sex, and language. And you are forced to look at Matthew McCjdosnfiebd's butt.

Once again my only problem with this movie is the people in the theater with me. The people behind me in the theater were laughing whenever a gay person was made fun of, but no time besides that, especially if it was beneficial for someone who isn't straight. Why do all of the best movies have the worst audiences. Rush was another great movie with a terrible audience. In that movie the lady next to me was on her phone the whole movie, and someone laughed during one of the most intense scenes in the movie. So yeah all homophobes don't go see this movie and ruin it for all of the normal, decent, kind, NOT EVIL PEOPLE.....if you can't tell I hate homophobes.

10/10 the new best movie of the year!(yay)

But seriously STUPID, EVIL, homophobes don't watch this movie in the theater. You should however watch it on blu-ray and maybe it will teach you to feel empathy LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!

(If anyone ever is reading this, comment and tell me if my reviews are getting boring because I'm being so positive.)